Ridiculous question from the internet: Can a human get a dog pregnant?

Source of said ridiculous question: Google Autofill*

Science’s answer: Oh my God No! We are hoping this is just curiosity and nothing… more. Seriously, though – most species can not mate successfully with other species for a variety of reasons, mostly because they physically can’t, or biologically their anatomy and physiology won’t permit it. In the few cases where this is possible, the two species in question are closely related, meaning they diverged evolutionary in the relatively recent past. Here are some fun examples:

• Horse + Donkey = Mule
• Zebra + Donkey = Zonkey (or Zeedonk)
• Cow + Yak = Dzo
• Cow + Bison = Beefalo
• Grizzly Bear + Polar Bear = Really Dangerous Bear (Ursid Hybrid)
• Lion + Tiger = Liger
• Dog + Wolf = Big Mean Dog (Canid Hybrid)
• European Honey Bee + African Honey Bee = Really Mean Bees (Killer Bees)

In most cases, species that can interbreed have the same number, or at least a very similar number of chromosomes. You & I, however, have 23 sets of chromosomes, while a dog has 39 (despite having fewer genes overall). From a practical chromosomal segregation standpoint, that is a dumpster fire. It just won’t work.

Ridiculous question from the internet: What is toxic to a dog?

Source of said ridiculous question: Yahoo Answers

Science’s answer: Let’s begin this way: Please don’t poison your dog. I can’t stress this enough.

Now, we are going to assume that this question is most often asked to help loving pet owners not poison their dogs. That’s great. Here are some things to avoid:

1. Anything that you think is poisonous to humans. In many ways, dogs are just like us! In particular, keep them away from pesticides, insecticides, and cleaning products
2. Chocolate. Yes, this is true. Your dog has to eat a lot of chocolate to get really sick, but dogs are not known for eating in moderation, so keep it away from your pooch to be safe.
3. Human drugs – particularly large doses of those pain relievers (Ibuprofen, Acetaminophen, Naproxen) you have lying around or prescription medications that target the brain (anti-depressants, ADHD medications, etc).
4. Food containing xylitol. This is commonly used in candies, particularly sugar-free or low sugar candies, gummies, mints, and gums, but can also be found in human toothpaste and some drug or supplement tablets. Xylitol is dangerous in dogs because (unlike humans) it stimulates insulin release and can lead to hypoglycemia (low blood sugar).
5. Grapes, raisins, and currants. This is a new one – over the last several years, veterinarians have noticed an increased risk of kidney failure in dogs who have eaten these foods. It’s not clear yet why they might be toxic (most suspect a fungal contaminant), and not all dogs seem affected. Best to keep your dogs away from grapes, raisins, and currants for now.

Ridiculous question from the internet: Can a goat be potty trained?

Source of said ridiculous question: Google Autofill**

Science’s answer: It looks like, yes, it can be done, if you’re into that. It doesn’t look easy, and you’re not gonna get them to actually use a toilet, but some people claim to have gotten them use a litter box or just do their business outside. Good luck with that.

Ridiculous question from the internet: Can a fish get high?

Source of said ridiculous question: Google Autofill***

Science’s answer: Fish and all vertebrates (animals with a backbone) can get high because they have the cannabinoid receptors (CB1 and CB2) just like you & I.  It’s probably not easy to get a fish high, since THC (the activite ingredient in marijuana) is not water soluble, but it’s technically possible.

With this said, please don’t get your fish (or any other pets) high. You may think they like it, but keep in mind that if you are thinking this is a good idea you are almost certainly already high yourself. For all we know, this could be a really terrifying experience for a fish. We never thought we’d have to say this, but: Just say “no” to fish hot-boxing.

Ridiculous question from the internet: A teacher of mine said that if you put a bowl of milk outside a dog that has worm’s butthole, the worms will come out [sic] BC they like the milk. Is this true?

Source of said ridiculous question: Yahoo Answers

Science’s answer: No. UYBFS strongly recommends that you do the following:

1. Advise your teacher that this doesn’t work and make sure they take their dog to the veterinarian to get de-wormed like a normal, responsible pet owner.
2. Get your dog de-wormed by a veterinarian like a normal, responsible pet owner, as needed.
3. Find a new teacher
4. Forget everything else this teacher has taught you

* For the record, the answers to these Google Autofill questions are: No, No, You can’t get the dog parvovirus, but there is a human parvovirus you can get, and yes.

* For the record, the answers to these Google Autofill questions are: Yes, kinda, no, but they can be therapy animals, and yes.

*For the record, the answers to these Google Autofill questions are: Yes (when there is not enough oxygen in the water), yes (though mostly they see what is in the water), yes, and yes.